woh..it's been a long time since i update my blog..? yeah..busy playing maple. hahahax..well, always update blog becoz i'm very unhappy..guess this is the motive i wrote again?

i don't knw what went wrong recently..and my academic results are falling..my chem, ss and chi. haix..i knw how to do it or i simply don't? maybe i'm jus tryin to act smart. feelin extremely upset over my results. right now i'm questionin myself..am i playin too much and nt concentrating? What went wrong? dating too much neglectin studies? I don't knw. the doubt cause me to keep quiet for almost all the recess..thinkin over and over again. Why did'nt i get it right? I studied..maybe nt hard enough? nor smart? There's seems no answer to my doubt.

Why? Why? Why? my way of life seems to came to halt. i was going smoothly during my first semt..but wat happen to my attitude towards my second semt? I wanna top the class..i wanna take the scholarship..my MAIN target this year. But everything seems so far away. i'm gettin further each day. My confidence is deteriorating at the same time. Gradually, i start to lost interest in studies.

Pls..I wan back my confidence. I wan back everything i had last semt. I really need it..for me to push on. I don't wanna disappoint my mum, my family and anyone concern. Nowadays, things are so complicated to me. my mind swirling... i'm simply very TROUBLED. studies..basketball..everythinig. the coach is jus practisin favouritism to the chinese and neglect bout us. i totally see no quality in those chinese. why mus u always use the export? we are singaporeans and u should use us to deliver NOT THE CHINESE! they are freakin slack and yet u don't even knw a single shit. together with my friends..we had sweat blood through 2 years of C boys training..instead of gellin us..u split us apart by puttin in a chinese freak. hai..i don't understand.

common test is coming. i really have to score..i need to show my mum waat i can do and wat i promise her to do. hai..lastly, dear..sorry. i don't knw why i have to say it. but i feel i really owe u one.

rocky life-